I Just Have To Share
I haven’t been able to sleep for awhile; I have had a bad spout of insomnia, which isn’t too unusual for me. But the last time I had it was when we lived in Oregon. You are tired but you cannot sleep and your mind is active and keeps going and going. If you go through it for days then sometimes the things you daydream start getting confused with reality, at least kind of. Now and again I will get some good sleep and think the spout is over with but then that next night your up again. So obviously you do a lot of thinking when you’re laying there trying to go to sleep which I have been doing for several weeks now.
I’ve had this deep concern lately about people I hold very close and dear to my heart that do not know the Lord. You can say it has really been bothering me to think that someone actually doesn’t believe in Him. I don’t think I have ever gone a day in my life without believing that God existed. I know there are millions that don’t believe but I cannot for a second fathom the idea of waking up every morning not knowing that there is a God who loves me and wants to protect me. I cannot fathom this for a second, but there are people out there and people I know that think this. I have known a lot of these people for years and they know my love and devotion to the Lord and I have never been one to preach because I know that I am not the best example out there to be one to preach but I have shared and my friends have seen the joy within me and questioned me on this joy and a lot of them have come to know Christ through questioning me on what makes me tick and what I believe but a lot haven’t because I have never preached.
As many of you know I almost lost my life a year ago from a bad pregnancy which was very dangerous and not caught on time. Recently I had another one and the miracle of it was that it was caught way early. It really got me thinking about death and what waits for me on the other side. I have to admit, at first I was scared thinking, what if I was wrong? But night after night I have been sitting here thinking about what if I didn’t know Him, who would I be? And the answer is hopeless. Because to wake up without knowing Him gives no hope in my life. And thinking this has sparked such a fire in my soul… I remember the verse in Jeremiah chapter 20 that says, “But His word was in my heart like a burning fire Shut up in my bones; I was weary of holding it back, And I could not.” That is exactly how I feel right now too. I can’t hold back any longer.
John 15:13Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Today was Good Friday, the day that Christ died a gruesome death on the cross and what many people don’t know is why He died. Yeah they hear all the time that Jesus died for our sins but what does that really mean? That doesn’t mean anything to anyone usually; sometimes it really doesn’t mean anything to me, at least being put like that. But lets all stand back for a minute and take a look at our lives… think of all the lies I have told, the people I have hurt (even unintentionally) all the emotional roller coasters of hatred, lust, fighting, bickering… even though these are normal every day reactions in a humans life that sometimes we just cannot help or control it proves right away that we are not perfect and that we are sinners, we are sinners for just simply being human beings. God created us to have hearts, mind & souls of our own. People often say if I was God I would have just created people to believe in me, but would that have really been genuine love, is to love someone because they tell you to? No. I would want someone to love me because they wanted to love me. And I thank God that He gave me that choice. I went to a Christian school for several years and it almost destroyed my belief in Christ, that school expected us to all be little good robot soldiers for Christ and we were not allowed to be individuals. And I know that a lot of people have experienced that in their life and it has turned them off to hear anything about what is to be told about God. But trust me that I learned for myself that there is freedom in Christ Jesus our Lord, there is freedom and He loves us just the way we are… all our baggage, all our sins, all the lifestyles that we choose to live for ourselves, He loves us no matter what. I don’t care who you are or what you have done or even how you choose to live your life, that is between you and God, all I know is that without a shadow of a doubt that Jesus loves you and He was nailed upon the cross for you because we are the one’s that deserved to be up there but He took our place and bore the sins of this world upon His shoulders so we would not have to perish with this baggage. I truly believe that even if you don’t believe in Him or know who Jesus Christ is, He still took your sin for you if you like to believe it or not. The only thing He ever asks from us is not to be perfect and He doesn’t expect us to walk that straight and narrow line because He knows for damn sure that we are incapable… all He asks is that we believe in Him and that we learn who He is and I guarantee you when you start to learn who He is you will start to love Him after you find out who He is and then its up to you how you want to show your love towards Him. It’s not up to your piers or a pastor or a TV evangelist how you want to show your love to Him, it is up to you, this is your personal relationship with the Maker and Creator of this world.
Some of my friends may think that I am preaching, maybe I was, but I don’t want to ever leave this world like I almost have twice not ever at least trying to tell people who I know God is.
I’ve had this deep concern lately about people I hold very close and dear to my heart that do not know the Lord. You can say it has really been bothering me to think that someone actually doesn’t believe in Him. I don’t think I have ever gone a day in my life without believing that God existed. I know there are millions that don’t believe but I cannot for a second fathom the idea of waking up every morning not knowing that there is a God who loves me and wants to protect me. I cannot fathom this for a second, but there are people out there and people I know that think this. I have known a lot of these people for years and they know my love and devotion to the Lord and I have never been one to preach because I know that I am not the best example out there to be one to preach but I have shared and my friends have seen the joy within me and questioned me on this joy and a lot of them have come to know Christ through questioning me on what makes me tick and what I believe but a lot haven’t because I have never preached.
As many of you know I almost lost my life a year ago from a bad pregnancy which was very dangerous and not caught on time. Recently I had another one and the miracle of it was that it was caught way early. It really got me thinking about death and what waits for me on the other side. I have to admit, at first I was scared thinking, what if I was wrong? But night after night I have been sitting here thinking about what if I didn’t know Him, who would I be? And the answer is hopeless. Because to wake up without knowing Him gives no hope in my life. And thinking this has sparked such a fire in my soul… I remember the verse in Jeremiah chapter 20 that says, “But His word was in my heart like a burning fire Shut up in my bones; I was weary of holding it back, And I could not.” That is exactly how I feel right now too. I can’t hold back any longer.
John 15:13Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.
Today was Good Friday, the day that Christ died a gruesome death on the cross and what many people don’t know is why He died. Yeah they hear all the time that Jesus died for our sins but what does that really mean? That doesn’t mean anything to anyone usually; sometimes it really doesn’t mean anything to me, at least being put like that. But lets all stand back for a minute and take a look at our lives… think of all the lies I have told, the people I have hurt (even unintentionally) all the emotional roller coasters of hatred, lust, fighting, bickering… even though these are normal every day reactions in a humans life that sometimes we just cannot help or control it proves right away that we are not perfect and that we are sinners, we are sinners for just simply being human beings. God created us to have hearts, mind & souls of our own. People often say if I was God I would have just created people to believe in me, but would that have really been genuine love, is to love someone because they tell you to? No. I would want someone to love me because they wanted to love me. And I thank God that He gave me that choice. I went to a Christian school for several years and it almost destroyed my belief in Christ, that school expected us to all be little good robot soldiers for Christ and we were not allowed to be individuals. And I know that a lot of people have experienced that in their life and it has turned them off to hear anything about what is to be told about God. But trust me that I learned for myself that there is freedom in Christ Jesus our Lord, there is freedom and He loves us just the way we are… all our baggage, all our sins, all the lifestyles that we choose to live for ourselves, He loves us no matter what. I don’t care who you are or what you have done or even how you choose to live your life, that is between you and God, all I know is that without a shadow of a doubt that Jesus loves you and He was nailed upon the cross for you because we are the one’s that deserved to be up there but He took our place and bore the sins of this world upon His shoulders so we would not have to perish with this baggage. I truly believe that even if you don’t believe in Him or know who Jesus Christ is, He still took your sin for you if you like to believe it or not. The only thing He ever asks from us is not to be perfect and He doesn’t expect us to walk that straight and narrow line because He knows for damn sure that we are incapable… all He asks is that we believe in Him and that we learn who He is and I guarantee you when you start to learn who He is you will start to love Him after you find out who He is and then its up to you how you want to show your love towards Him. It’s not up to your piers or a pastor or a TV evangelist how you want to show your love to Him, it is up to you, this is your personal relationship with the Maker and Creator of this world.
Some of my friends may think that I am preaching, maybe I was, but I don’t want to ever leave this world like I almost have twice not ever at least trying to tell people who I know God is.
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